He brought that into the marriage, and you brought that into the marriage, and you've nurtured it over the years. But as you've matured in your marriage, you've understood that he has a particular roll to play. It is this: to accept from God the responsibility of caring for and overseeing your well being so that you have every opportunity to be all that God created you and redeemed you to be.

Here's the question: If you're in a marriage like that, wouldn't you go along with that? Wouldn't you say, “That sounds good to me. I'm going to cooperate with him, I'm going to partner with him. I'm going to make absolutely certain that he has every chance to do what God has told him to do. He is going to find somebody one hundred percent on his side.” There's one word for that, it's called submitting. What a shame that there's been such a misunderstanding of what Paul is saying, so that some men use this verse to basically rule the roost and dominate their wives and threaten the possibilities of them being all they're intended to be, for purely selfish, male reasons.

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On the other hand, what a tragedy it is that sometimes there are women who show little interest in discovering all that God has made them to be. Because they think if they do, they might take some risks which they'd rather not risk taking. So, what is the consent that is necessary to Paul's teaching on marriage?

This is my final point: Husbands and wives need to consent to basic Christian principles of love and submission. Go home, husbands and wives, and ask yourselves, Are we agreed on this, that Christians are dearly loved by God and as such seek to imitate God, and they do it by becoming more like Christ, who loved and submitted and gave himself up. Is that our fundamental attitude in general? Then say, "And do we consent to the fact that this is only possible in the fullness of the Spirit." So we will encourage each other to discover more and more of life in the fullness of the Spirit. Will we consent to this: That the husband consents to the responsibility of loving his wife, and the wife happily submits to it, and deeply respects her husband for it?

"Gracious Lord, there's so much for us to wrestle with here, so much for us to think through. Will You help the brothers and sisters who are married to agree together that the fundamentals of Christian behavior are an imitation of Christ in His love sacrifice? Will You help them decide in their own hearts whether they are encouraging each other to life in the fullness of the Spirit? Would You help husbands to think through what it means for them to be responsible, under God, to be a source of nourishment and encouragement and support for their wives? And help wives to look at their attitudes toward their husbands, and see if they're encouraging them in this role; partnering with them, in the task, respecting them for it. Hear our prayers, let our cries come unto You in the Name of Jesus, our Savior. Amen.”