"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." The key to understanding this statement from Jesus' Sermon on the Mount is the realization that the one who determines the gift is God, and the ones who determine whether or not the gift is received are those to whom the gift is offered.

Recently, I drove our eldest son back to the college he attends. As we were traveling south on Interstate 75 in Ohio, we were passed by a shiny red Chevrolet 4x4 Blazer. Our son looked at the Blazer and then looked at me and said, "Dad, that is what I want."

The request did not surprise me. Ever since he received his driver's license, he has been saying, "I want a 4x4 Chevrolet Blazer." As a father who did not have his first vehicle until he had graduated from college, I am resistant to such requests. Still, due to my desire for my children's happiness, I feel a tug -- love, I suppose -- to oblige.

The major roadblock is that we have two other sons who have their requests, as well as the conviction that the resources we have are best given to further their education. As parents in this case, we determine the gift; our sons determine whether or not they will accept the gift.

Jesus, in trying to explain His statement about asking and seeking and knocking, gives the illustration of a parent who receives a request from a son: "Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or, if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake?"

The answer is obvious. A parent who loves his child, even though that parent may not have the resources to give the actual request, will not give in its place something useless (a stone) or something harmful (a snake). The parent will give what she or he determines is best to give. "How much more will your Father in heaven," says Jesus, "give good gifts to those who ask Him!"

The language of this statement is the language of intimacy. In prayer jargon, it is the language of petition. It is between you and the Father, the Father and you. What is it that you want from the Father for yourself, just for yourself? And is what the Father has to give in line with what you want? Are you receptive to what the Father deems best? Or, would you rather hold out for a 4x4 Chevrolet Blazer?

Do you have the same struggle I have with asking God? With regard to prayer, I am much more likely to ask on behalf of another than to ask for myself. I feel rather like John Killinger when he wrote of the hospitality with which he was received into a friend's house:

They received me into their lovely house, which the wife had labored all day to clean for my arrival. They ushered me into the most comfortable bedroom, where their own clothes had been removed from the closet to make room for mine. They set before me a sumptuous meal, served on their finest china and with their best silver. They give me an evening of devoted attention before a roaring fire in the sanctity of their family parlor. And then, when it is time to bid good night and retire to our beds, they say, "Now, if you need anything, just ask."