John Wooden, former UCLA and Hall of Fame Basketball Coach, is a master at that. He was in Indianapolis for the basketball game between Duke and UCLA. UCLA got stomped and played horribly. After the game a reporter asked Coach Wooden what he thought of the Bruin's performance. He smiled a gentlemanly smile and said something like, "Well, anything I would say would probably be construed as criticism, therefore I think it would be wiser for me not to comment on the loss. I'm sure the coach is going to make adjustments as the season goes on." No wonder he's still respected and loved even though he's over 90 years old.

By the way young people, if you want to help cure a critical spirit, sometimes we need to be confronted. Maybe you need to say, "You know, Dad, you're getting to sound like a real crank!" Well, maybe not that bluntly. The Bible does say, "Do not rebuke an older man harshly" (1 Timothy 5:1), but we do need to be held accountable. Don't let us get by with griping all the time. It hurts us as well as others.

Advertisement

The best way to help us cure a critical spirit is to praise the positive in us. Catch us being good! "Mom, you have such a great spirit toward people. That makes you a joy to be around." "Dad, I appreciate your not jumping all over my case for the way I dress. Thanks!"

Greg Allen will sometimes say to me, "I just talked to a preacher who wanted to know every detail about the worship service I'm leading at their church. Bob, I want you to know how much I appreciate the freedom and flexibility I have here. Thanks for not being a crotchety, old preacher." Do you think that makes me less likely to be critical and more likely to be supportive of Greg in the future? You bet!

There was basically universal agreement that the number one temptation for older people is worry. The older you get, the more temptation there is to be anxious about tomorrow. One reason is that there are more physical problems. Every ache you think, "This could be the big one!" Or, "This could be cancer. I don't have enough insurance. I hate to think of going through chemotherapy. I'll probably die a slow painful death." And all that is before you go to the doctor!

Also, the longer you live, the more bad things you've seen happen. Kids don't worry much because they naively think, "It will never happen to me." But as you get older you have seen more bad things happen. You wind up saying stupid things to your grandchildren like, "When you ride that roller coaster, don't unfasten your seat belt and stand up. You could fall out." They'll say, "Grandma, you worry about the silliest things!" You respond, "It can happen. I remember back in 2003 a young woman did that and fell to her death."

As you get older, you worry more, because you have more family members you really care about. One of our young, substitute teachers planned a lesson on worry to our oldest class a few years ago. He began by asking, "What is your number one worry?" He expected them to say finances or health. But they all agreed instantly their number one worry was their kids. Okay he said, "What is your second greatest worry?" Again they were in agreement. The second greatest worry was their grandchildren. He had to change the application of his lesson.