'I Don't Love You Anymore': Maintaining Sweetness in Your Marriage
Proverbs 5
I recently read about the divorce of a dentist and his wife. She filed for divorce, she said, because her husband never spoke to her except to give a direct order. And in 18 years of marriage, he had only bought her two gifts, one of which was a potato peeler.
Three years ago, Christian Woman magazine ran a sequence of articles on "Suggestions for keeping romance alive." I don't usually read such things, but here's a few of the suggestions I can read to you:
"Because he's a bicycle enthusiast, my husband, Dennis, suggested we buy a tandem bike. Along the 3,500 miles we've logged so far, we've shared sights, sounds, laughter, tears, and pain. Because we sit so close together, it's easy to talk, sharing the day's concerns or what God's been teaching us recently. Dennis says it means a great deal to him that I've embraced one of his hobbies. Likewise, I've seen his patience in teaching me the sport's skills."
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"Among other things, my husband, Lauren, and I like to read stories out loud to each other over a pot of tea. Recently we read Pride and Prejudice and The Best of James Herriott. This is a much richer experience than watching television!"
"My husband, John, and I keep romance alive in our 32-year marriage by remembering our time as college sweethearts. Every few years we travel back to the college where we met. There we stroll hand in hand and kiss again where we kissed for the first time — the women's dorm where I used to live. We pause and thank the Lord for bringing us together so long ago"
Believe me, there were others that I couldn't possibly read from the pulpit!
Proverbs chapters 5-7 are concerned with the evils of adultery, with chapter 5 focusing especially on a warning about "the seductress," and the price of unchastity (and there's always a price!). It closes with a section urging fidelity as the better path to follow. Since the book of Proverbs is a book containing advice from a father to a son, the warnings are addressed to men about the allurement and dangers of women, but it could just as easily have been in the reverse. No essential principle has been lost if we turn the passage around and warn young women of the allurement and dangers of unprincipled men!
The essential message of this chapter is a simple one:
• "Drink water from your own cistern and fresh water from your own well" (5:15).
• "Let your fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of your youth" (5:17).