When my car overheated on the way to the desert, I thought I could make it over the top of the hill and coast down. Paying $488 for blown head gaskets was a painful way to learn that I should have stopped and let the engine cool.
Damage to a piece of metal is one thing; damage to people is a far more costly thing. Anger not properly discharged leads to hostility. While anger is an emotional response, hostility is an ongoing attitude, one that endangers those who hold it as well as its object. Anger is energy; anger is a fire that burns within us. When we say, "That really burns me," we are closer to the truth than we may realize.
Scripture urges us not to let the sun go down on our anger. In other words, catch your response before it turns to bitterness. A pastor friend compares it to manna. God told the Hebrews to collect enough manna for each day; what was left overnight turned sour on them. Likewise, unattended anger turns rotten and becomes the devil's opportunity to poison us.
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Clench your fist in the posture of bitter people. Even if the fist is not clenched, in anger the heart is. It blocks our ability to receive from God or to give to people. That is why James wrote, "Let every man be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger .... Therefore put away all filthiness and rank growth of wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls" (
James 1:19-21).
Bitter people need healing of the hurts -- the cancerous growths -- in their lives so they can receive God's Word and live as whole people. Anger is a response. It is not a root problem. It is the result of hurt (physical or emotional), frustration, or fear. We need to get at the root cause of our anger and bring it to God for His healing. It may take days, weeks, or months (even my car wasn't fixed in a day).
Paul wrote, "Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, with all malice, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you" (
Eph. 4:31).
You may wish to take these steps to get good and angry: (1) Acknowledge your anger; (2) Confess where it has turned to sin, acknowledging where you tend to brood over the inconsistencies of others; (3) Forgive those you are hostile with -- God wants to free you from the tyranny of resentment; (4) Learn to stop, look and listen! Stop before you say something or try to retaliate; Look to see why you are angry; Listen for a better response than acting on your anger.