I've
also tried to at least give some consideration to what critics say. Sometimes
I've asked a trusted counselor if the criticism has any merit. If it does, it's
not criticism, even if said with malice; it's instruction. It can add value
to who we are, what we do, or how we do it. "Listen to advice and accept
instruction, and in the end you will be wise" (Proverbs 19:20). If
it's not true, we should forget it and get back about the business of serving
the Lord. Praise is a wonderful ego booster but it is in criticism that we grow.
That is why I call criticism and slander "blessed manure!"
Remember
how Jesus dealt with opposition and criticism. Often He refused to answer, particularly
when His detractors didn't really want to hear the truth. Only when they seemed
teachable — and simply had their facts wrong — did He respond. Ask
God to give you discernment here about which critics to answer and when to hold
your tongue.
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Whatever
you do, don't respond in kind. You can't throw dirt without getting your hands
dirty. Don't become defensive. It's natural to want to vindicate yourself, but
no matter how off-base the critic may be, cut him, or her, some slack. We never
know what is going on in their life away from our relationship.
"A
gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger" (Proverbs
15:1). Ask God to help you to know when to be silent and when to, gently but
firmly, set the record straight.
But,
above all else, remember that you're in good company. Every great servant of
God in history has had to deal with criticism and slander. Unless it has merit,
wear it as a medal of honor!
_______________________
Robert
Leslie Holmes, pastor of Pittsburgh's First Presbyterian Church, is a contributing
editor to Preaching. He is the author of a number of books. The latest,
The Creed: Life Principles for Today (Ambassador-Emerald Int'l), examines
the Apostles' Creed in the light of post-modernism. You may reach him at rlholmes@fpcp.org.