I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped on. I can’t afford one so I’m wearing my garage door opener.
I was thinking about how I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn’t like me anyway.
I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans!
I was thinking about old age and decided that it is when you still have something on the ball but you are just too tired to bounce it.
I was thinking about making a fitness movie for folks my age and call it “Pumping Rust.”
I was thinking that the next time someone sees my cat’s litter box and says, “Oh, have you got a cat?” I’ll say, “No, it’s for company!”
I was thinking that employment application blanks always ask who is to be notified in case of an emergency. I think you should write, “A Good Doctor!”
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older then it dawned on me… they are cramming for finals. (from the God, Clean Funnies List)