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  • Michael Duduit
    March 1994
    As I sit at the computer on a winter day -- the snow piling higher by the moment -- and dream of spring, several things come to mind:-...
  • Michael Duduit
    January 1994
    We preachers live and die by words. Sometimes die is hardly an overstatement, as in the case of the pastor who announced to his congregation,...
  • Michael Duduit
    November 1993
    While the rest of America gets into the joyous spirit of Christmas, I'm still working on that stupid list.You know the one I'm talking...
  • Michael Duduit
    September 1993
    During the state fair, my wife and I received free admission to a musical concert. Early in the concert I noticed something I had never...
  • Michael Duduit
    July 1993
    Preaching is about to get what many of its readers probably thought it's always had: a full-time editor.It seems like only yesterday...
  • Michael Duduit
    May 1993
    One of the interesting things we learned about Bill Clinton during the campaign and transition was that he has a cadre of long-time...
  • Michael Duduit
    March 1993
    "We had a grand and glorious Sunday," said Brother Bill to his fellow pastors on Monday morning."Every Sunday at your church is grand...
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Will Jesus Make it to the Super Bowl?
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Will Jesus Make it to the Super Bowl?
By Michael Duduit
Some things you just have to see for yourself.

Go to your computer right now and look this up: http://www.catholicshopper.com/products/inspirational_sport_statues.html

For those who don't have access to the Internet -- the above link takes you to an order page for Jesus Inspirational Sports Statues. According to the dealer, these "handpainted resin statues on a solid wood base ... portray Jesus actively participating with boys and girls in a variety of sports. A wonderful way to reinforce Jesus 'as friend' in everyday activities."

Sure enough, you'll find statues of Jesus playing baseball, basketball (I think he's about to do an "in your face" dunk over the six-year-old's head), soccer (as he elbows the young boy out of the way as he prepares to kick the winning goal). Another statue portrays Jesus taking a handoff as another boy foolishly attempts to tackle him. (Is that considered a sin?)
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Other statues show Jesus with children playing golf, doing ballet (obviously not a Baptist interpretation of Jesus' leisure activities), and martial arts. (Fortunately, the statue does not show Jesus doing a karate chop on someone's head.) I particularly like the hockey statue, where it looks as if Jesus is about to check his opponent on the way to a winning goal. (A theological question here: can Jesus ever miss hitting a goal?)

There are more statues (including skiing, running, and so on), but you get the idea. I must admit as I look back on my own misspent youth of playing baseball and flag football, I never actually thought about Jesus playing those sports with me. I guess as an eight-year-old I probably thought He had more important things to do, like sustaining creation and keeping the deacons in line and stuff like that. I'm not sure if a statue like this would have inspired me to great athletic achievements or not. (Hard to say, since I sort of peaked as an athlete in third grade.)

Now that I see what's possible, I can visualize a whole new line of Jesus statues for adults. Think of the possibilities: Jesus as accountant, sitting at the calculator. If He'd been on the job, Arthur Andersen would have blown the whistle on Enron right away. There would be no statues of Jesus standing at a shredder.

Or Jesus as check-out clerk, always getting the change correct. Or Jesus as a businessman doing a hostile takeover, but being very compassionate in handing out the pink slips.

Maybe a statue with Jesus as webmaster, sitting at the computer with dozens of coffee cups everywhere. (A theological question here: would Jesus pay $3 for a cup of Starbucks, or would he go for the discount stuff and give the rest of the money to the church building fund?)

Of course, my favorite statue would be the one of Jesus as pastor, sitting at His desk working on next week's sermon - with an open copy of Preaching magazine in front of Him!
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